Our Anonymous Astrology Guru Confirms We're Still Pisces, Says to Ignore Daily Horoscopes

When we heard the news that the Zodiac had change, we both flipped. After all, we’d always sort of assumed one of the reasons we share so many eerily parallel life experiences was the fact that we were born just four days apart. Turns out we we were right – a quick session with our anonymous astrology guru revealed we (and every other Pisces) can rest assured the signs haven’t changed, that daily horoscopes are full of crap, and that the planets can be blamed for our darling mothers.

Are we really not Pisces anymore? We’re freaking out. We identify with being Pisces so much!

Ah yes, the whole “there are now thirteen signs!” panic. Never fear: all we’ve actually learned is how fast an inaccurate news story can fly around the mainstream media. The Western Zodiac, which is what most astrologers use, is a man-made system based on the earth’s seasons, unlike the Sidereal Zodiac, which is based on the positions of the stars. Therefore nothing has changed, and I give you permission to remain your neurotic, fishy Pisces selves! As the wonderful Astrobarry says: “There is absolutely no new news being reported here. The gap between (1) the constellations’ positions and (2) the celestial regions that comprise the signs, now approximately 23 degrees, is something any credible astrologer already knows about.”

How can astrology and the fact that we were born four days apart explain the weird parallels in our lives?

Well, if you believe that the positions of the planets at the time of our birth imprints upon us our personality and our destiny, then it stands to reason that parallels will exist. The two of you’s planets are nearly all in the same signs as each other, and you have similar “aspects” – to name just a couple, you both have Sun conjunct Mercury (making you great thinkers and communicators) and Venus conjunct Mars (meaning you possess strong sexual magnetism and tend to make romance central to your lives!). Childhood experiences and relationships with parents are signified by particular natal aspects, and I know you’ve noticed some remarkable similarities in that regard. Your mutual Moon square Uranus aspect, to take just one example, is often associated with a difficult or unstable mother figure.

The other consideration in terms of your life “parallels” is that you’ll experience the effects of planetary transits – when the movements of the planets make specific connections with the pattern of the planets in your natal charts – simultaneously. For instance, you moved in with your respective boyfriends last summer, correct? At the time you’d both have been experiencing Saturn trine Jupiter (associated with the setting of long term goals, as well as maturing when it comes to relationships), Mars trine Jupiter (decisiveness, positive action, assertiveness), and Neptune conjunct Sun (a long transit that prompts profound inner changes and shifts in identity).

There are of course differences in your charts: you have different Moon signs and different rising signs, which will account for some major differences in your personalities, the way you relate to the world, and the shape of events as they unfold.

We blog a lot about relationships. Can our sign compatibility really predict our long-term compatibility with our boyfriends? If we don’t have good “synastry,” does that mean our relationships are doomed?

Yes, and yes! Just kidding, sort of: synastry – the way that two natal charts connect – is a very strong predictor of attraction and romantic compatibility. That being said, you probably wouldn’t be in the relationship in the first place were there not some pre-existing indicators of romantic success. And as it happens, there seem to be quite a few:

A quick glance at Miriam and her boyfriend’s synastry chart shows lots of sparky linkages between the Sun, Moon, Mars and Venus, including Moon sextile Sun (a very harmonious aspect suggestive of a fruitful partnership). There’s also a Pluto-Mars opposition (passion and competitiveness!) and a Pluto-Venus opposition (emotional extremes and obsessiveness!).

Ellyn also has Pluto opposition Mars with her boyfriend, as well as Moon conjunct Sun (showing a strong affinity, a linkage often seen in married couples), Venus square Moon (strong indicator of romance, challenging but in a good way), and Moon conjunct Mars (powerful sexual chemistry), among various other linkages.

Can we trust daily horoscopes? Should we?

Definitely not: the crudeness of looking at only the sun sign, plus the fact that what’s really significant in astrological forecasting is long-term trends over months and years, not the minor changes from day to day, makes daily horoscopes pretty pointless. Some of the better monthly horoscopes can be useful to learn about general trends, though.

Sources usually say a Pisces weaknesses are being oversensitive, indecisive, and impractical. Anything we can do to counter that?

Absolutely! Develop the characteristics of your Moon and rising signs. Your Moon sign reveals your inner, emotional self, while your rising sign is the face you project to the world.

Ellyn, you have a Taurus Moon and Aquarius Ascendant: your Taurean qualities are stability, compassion, and finely developed taste and style; your Aquarian qualities are independence, charisma, and creativity.

Miriam, I’m afraid you’re a double Pisces with a Pisces Sun and Moon! So you should just embrace your watery, sensitive, feminine ways. Big consolation: your rising sign is Scorpio, well known as the sexiest sign of the zodiac. A Scorp ascendant will endow you with ultra determination, pride, and an unusual degree of power over others.

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2 Responses to Our Anonymous Astrology Guru Confirms We're Still Pisces, Says to Ignore Daily Horoscopes

  1. Mummy says:

    “Your mutual Moon square Uranus aspect, to take just one example, is often associated with a difficult or unstable mother figure.” OUCH!

  2. Pingback: Tweets that mention Our Anonymous Astrology Guru | JFKLAX -- Topsy.com

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