Category Archives: Girls

Our Anonymous Astrology Guru Confirms We're Still Pisces, Says to Ignore Daily Horoscopes

When we heard the news that the Zodiac had change, we both flipped. After all, we’d always sort of assumed one of the reasons we share so many eerily parallel life experiences was the fact that we were born just … Continue reading

Posted in Childhood, Cohabitation, Girls, Moms | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Please Help Me Not Kill My Boyfriend, He's So Well-Behaved!

Dear Miriam,  You know how sometimes girls get together and complain about guys? Well most of the time I really don’t have anything bad to say about Shaun. I trust him, he hardly ever wants “boys night,” and he’s really … Continue reading

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The Jersey Shore Situation

The Jersey Shore, b*tch! Similar to most Northeastern Americans, I’ve been going to the Jersey Shore every year since the beginning of time (1985). As I said in a previous post, my boyfriend is from a town about 15 minutes … Continue reading

Posted in Girls, Religion | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Roommate Romance

When Miriam first moved in with Bryan, her girlfriends from New York emailed to ask how it was going. Her response? “Mostly good, but also I want to punch him in the face most of the time.” Granted she just … Continue reading

Posted in Cohabitation, Girls, Los Angeles, New York | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

The Sweetest, Nicest Raging Bitch You'll Ever Meet

Apparently, I am a mean bitch. Which I did not fully recognize until I started blogging. Indulge me while I elaborate. I was on the phone with my dear friend Linley, whom I have known for amost twelve years, and … Continue reading

Posted in Family, Girls, Los Angeles, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

25 Going On Geriatric

I can’t wait until I’m old, so no one asks me to do anything. I’m 25 going on 85. Not that I don’t enjoy a nice dinner and a glass of wine, or a night at the theater. And believe … Continue reading

Posted in Cohabitation, Girls, New York | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Inner Yente Fail (Truth Hurts)

When a newly single girlfriend came to visit for a weekend getaway last month, I tried to set her up. It worked – for a hot second: “I should introduce you to _____. He’s really smart, loves to laugh, watch … Continue reading

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We Love Couples Friends!

Miriam says: Couples friends. Just the words make me think of the episode of Friends in which Monica and Chandler are so desperate to make couples friends they end up turning another couple off so much that the other couple … Continue reading

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A Royal Gossip Session

Ellyn: so about prince william… Miriam: … and kate middleton Miriam: he got uglier as he got old. am I too mean? Ellyn: he might be balding. I mean he does seem really nice which counts for something…plus the whole … Continue reading

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How Not To Be A Skank: LA Edition

When I was little, I was not a fashionista, I was a trashionista. There was a time when both the models in Land’s End catalogs (my mom used to dress me) and Alloy (and then I rebelled and encountered black … Continue reading

Posted in Fashion, Girls, Los Angeles, Moms, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment